In Memory Of...

Hi! Ashley here, to share a little bit about a woman who lived The Do Good life. A lot of people would call her Rita, a few would call her mom, and a bunch of us would call her Nanny (1940-2007).

me and Nanny in the late 80's

Now, this is from MY perspective, although I have yet to hear a story where she was anything different than how I saw her. Throughout my life, I watched Nanny be the nicest New Yorker that ever walked the streets in Central Florida. From the youngest age I have memories of spending time at her job, seeing her help person after person and family after family. She did it with a sincere smile on her face, even in the hardest moments. I have memories of her welcoming my biological mom back into her home multiple times when she was detoxing or had no place to go (*my mom has now been sober since 2012). I have memories of her saint like patience as a wild elementary aged kid went buck wild in her car while she was doing that kid a favor. That kid was me, in case that wasn't obvious. I was a WILD child in many moments, potentially a little feral. I'd then turn around and model, in front of her car, that I just tried to drive her absolutely bonkers in.

90s soccer fashion infront of Nanny's whip

Nanny worked for a social service place in Kissimmee, Florida. She would see a variety of people. Most were kind and thankful. Some seemed to have shame about needing support. I won't forget how many adults I saw in tears, saying they were sorry for needing help. Then there were the people who were ruthlessly mean to her and her colleagues who were there proper just doing their job. A job they chose to do because they wanted to help others. I will never understand the angry folks. Perhaps it was misplaced anger. I was often there as a kid, organizing the food pantry, looking at the different toys that were going to go to homes where they'd be loved, and observing a ton of different human interactions in the social service world back in the 1990s. Nanny had incredibly kind colleagues. They were always, all, so sweet and loving. Well, until some clients would get too rowdy. A couple of them had firm boundaries and could stand strong to hold those boundaries. I am grateful that they would jump in sometimes in tough moments and have Nanny's back.

Nanny was perhaps too nice.

She didn't just work her day job. She often had a part time job as well. It was always in efforts to help my biological mom. A second job was just another thing Nanny did for others at her own expense with a genuine smile on her face. She seemed to have a positive spin on how much she worked. She worked at Wal-Mart and at Target as cashiers. I frequent Target and always think of her. I miss her tremendously and it's been a while. She went on to Heaven in 2007. It doesn't seem to get easier to miss her, it just evolves and shows up differently sometimes.

Outside of work, she loved Julio Inglesias, Colin Firth, Pride and the Prejudice, QVC, Wendy's, the Mets, the Knicks, Ireland, and most of all, her grandkids. She made the best pancakes and enjoyed her coffee. She never wanted to be an inconvenience to anybody but would be there for all people in whatever way she could.

She traveled to Ireland once. That was her big trip, her bucket list trip. The biggest thing she ever did for herself. She went with her sister and lived out one of her dreams. She LOVED it. I attempted to go and explore Ireland in 2020. A way to spend some time with her and explore some of my heritage. I had to pause that due to the pandemic. I think it happened for a reason and I will share that reason at the end of this.

I am the first grandkid and the one that lived the closest. I am grateful for that, for her, for the 21 years of living with her or close to her. I was able to go to (sleep through) a Julio Inglesias concert, watch (probably too much) of The Pride and the Prejudice, and eat Wendy's chicken nuggets and enjoy frosties with her. I was able to see her every birthday, holiday, and plenty of days in between. I went to work with her, church with her, she was my cashier at Target, she even let me cook her Thanksgiving dinner one year and I had no clue what I was doing. It's now a thing I rock with confidence. She signed every card with a smiley face. She had relentless kindness in moments where I had to have pushed far past her boundaries as a tiny human. I guess that is what adults are supposed to do, but so many fail to be that kind in the hardest of times. She never failed in my eyes. She showed me love is an action. Not just to me, but to everybody she encountered.

Nanny with her oldest and youngest grandkid

Nanny was the first person to plant a seed of God into my soul and show me what leading with love looks like. Nanny did the Argentine tango with cancer for a few years. In April of 2007 she went into ICU. My final visits with Nanny were heart breaking, but I would not have changed a moment. I witnessed her mentally travel to different times in life, some were far before I was born. I went with it. I was willing to embark down memory lane and try to comfort her that the Christmas gifts weren't wrapped, althought it was springtime. She needed the nurses but wouldn't ask for them because someobody else needed them more. Thankfully, the nurses were on it regardless of what Nanny wanted, they took care of her and she would always say thank you. Everytime. Remember though, as I mentioned, she did not want to inconvenience anybody at anytime. She wouldn't even use the electronic buggies at Publix because somebody else needed them more even if that day cancer was really giving her an extra hard time.

I was 21 when she passed away from cancer. Here I am on what would have been her 82nd birthday, sharing her beautiful soul with you all (and crying, because like I said, missing her doesn't soften). As I slowly sift through the memories, I am with the fullest and most grateful heart that I was her granddaughter. She was and still is, a huge influence on who I am as 37 year old me (not quite as feral). Thank you, Nanny.

Ireland, eh? Things certainly happen for a reason. Often, a thing that happens is the result of action or lack of action. We sometimes have control and sometimes we don't. Sometimes we work hard enough to get the result, sometimes we don't. Sometimes we work hard, plan perfectly, and then we still do not get the result. I worked hard, I planned perfectly, but I did not get to go to Ireland. Fast forward to 2023 :My wife and I welcomed our beautiful daughter into the world. Her name is Lennon, which was Nanny's maiden name. As Irish as it can get. Now, it seems a bit more fitting to take Lennon to Ireland and tell her all about the woman she was named after. Rita "Nanny" Lennon, a woman who loved Jesus and her coffee, slayed making pancakes, listened to latin music, and lived The Do Good life.

Thank you for your time in reading about my Nanny - it is deeply appreciated!

-Ashley =)